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I don't usually blog about myself. I'd rather write about Team Canada or CWHL or varsity players.

But the truth is, the reason I love watching those players is that I love playing myself.

I started playing when I was 28 years old, an age when many elite players are thinking of hanging up their skates. I'd been a figure skater growing up but never considered putting on hockey equipment until my friend Bonnie invited me to play summer pick-up.

Over the last seven years, I've played as often as I can and attended as many clinics as I can afford. I learned to skate on rocker blades, then carry the puck, then stickhandle a little, then shoot, and finally, to pass. I understand how the game works now and I've gotten to the point where I can play men's pick-up without cringing constantly. On a good night, I can score a goal in my women's rec league.

But on a night this past January, the coach asked me to play D, which I don't mind doing every so often. But this time, it was a horrific game. I fumbled the puck every time I picked it up. The next week was just as bad. As the clock wound down on the scoreboard, so did my confidence.

I haven't been able to get it back since.

I know it's silly. I should just accept the fact that I play for fun. Who cares how well I play, right, as long as I enjoy lacing up the skates? I'm 36 years old. After all, who do I think I am? I am and only ever will be a recreational player.

But I want to be good. I want to handle the puck like it's on a string. I want to skate like the wind and beat my opponent to the puck. I want to be strong and tough. I want to learn to roof the puck with a quick-release snap shot. I want to be good. Maybe not great, but good.

How does a 36-year-old woman follow her dream to be a better hockey player? Coaches aren't exactly lining up to invest in old ladies.

But when I'm on the ice, I don't feel like a 36-year-old mother of three kids. I feel like a kid myself. I feel young and strong and full of life. Maybe there's no Olympic gold or college scholarship in my future. But I can't wait to get back to the rink.

The Swedish women's hockey team beat Canada at the 2008 Four Nations' Cup. They beat the U.S. to take silver at the 2006 Winter Olympics in Salt Lake City. But last night just wasn't their night.

Canada came out of the gate last night banging and crashing, passing like a single entity and shooting bullets. They scored five times in the first period. Hayley Wickenheiser broke the record for goals scored in Olympic play, surpassing Danielle Goyette's record of 15. Meghan Agosta brought her tally for this Olympics alone to eight goals and two hat tricks. The second period saw seven Canadian pucks said past Swedish goaltender Kim Martin, who eventually left the net. Sweden broke the shut-out in the third period as Katrina Timglas finally found some space between Canada's Charline Labonte and the side of the net. Canada scored one last time, bringing the finally score to 13-1.

So what happened last night? Were the Swedes ill-prepared? Women's hockey is definitely developing at the international level but the best players are still so young. The Swedish superstar line of Enstrom, Ostberg and Myren are all still in their teens. Canada combines the young talent of phenoms like Poulin and Agosta with the maturity of veterans like Ouellette and Wickenheiser.

After losses to the U.S. at the last two IIHF World Championships, Canada has worked harder than ever this year with grueling training camps and a season playing the Alberta AAA midget boys. Plus, they've had a six-game series with the U.S. leading up to the Olympics.

It's simple: they're better than ever. 

As I watched Canada look like they were on a power play for most of the time Sweden was at full strength, I was torn. I love watching Canada dominate and score. They're like a fine wine or a piece of poetry. It's beautiful.

But I was wincing because I anticipated all the comments in the newspaper this morning about how women's hockey should be cancelled as an Olympic sport because of the lopsided results.  

The best female hockey players in the world are criticized and penalized for being too good.

That just doesn't make sense. 

Most people I've talked to about last night's 18-0 hammer job of Team Canada over Slovakia have one of two reactions. The most common is: "Poor Slovakia. What a blow-out." The other comment is: "How ridiculous. What a joke. There are only really two teams in women's hockey."

I disagree with both views. I don't feel badly for Slovakia at all. It's their first year at the Olympics. They've already won their victory just by showing up. The amount of depth, experience and preparation they've had in their Olympic program compared to that of the USA or Canada is negligible. If I were a Slovakian hockey player, I would be honoured just to be on the same ice surface as Team Canada. And they competed well. They should be proud.The only way their program can improve is by coming and storing up Olympic experience.

And it's not true that there are only two teams in women's hockey. Finland and Sweden have each beat the USA or Canada. International programs are improving with more skill and talent surfacing each year. And the scores are comparable to the types of scores in men's ice hockey when it first became an Olympic sport.

Patience, my friends. The women's game is growing well at the international level. Let's give it some time to develop!

Most of us don't get to go to the Olympics, me included. But I got a taste of Olympic excitement last night in Ottawa, Canada, when I watched Team Canada and Team USA battle through overtime and a shootout at Scotiabank Place in front of a record-breaking crowd of 16,347.

Canada continued their six-game winning streak against the USA with a 3-2 win, thanks to Jayna Hefford's shootout goal.

USA started the game with intense pressure and it seemed the first three or four shifts were all in Canada's end, with Canada unable to clear it out of the zone.

But Canada's doggedness paid off and they managed to create some good chances in the first period, including one in which Sarah Vaillancourt roofed it over US goaltender Jessie Vetter's shoulder. Team USA answered shortly after with gritty crease crashing to push it by Kim St. Pierre.

The score remained 1-1 through the second period. Canada had some pretty moments - especially when Vaillancourt and Hayley Wickenheiser played on the same line - but their passes just weren't connecting when it counted.

There was plenty of body contact and Canada was called for roughing several times. When it looked like a fight was brewing, however, the players turned and skated away - a testament to their emotional control.

At the beginning of the third period, Meghan Agosta picked up a loose puck in the slot and found the back of the net to make the score 2-1. In the final minute, Canada took a penalty and Team USA pulled the goaltender for a six-on-four attack. With 17.2 seconds left on the clock, Team USA's Jenny Potter tied the game with a point shot.

A five-minute four-on-four overtime yielded no change on the scoreboard so it went to a shootout. Jayna Hefford finished off the game with a sweet move in which she took Vetter to one side of the net and tucked it in the other.

It looked to me like the recent release of veteran defencemen Gillian Ferrari from the Olympic roster has taken its toll on Team Canada, as the D struggled to clear the puck and gave it away too many times. Despite winning seven of the last 10 games they've played against the US, Canada will need to tighten its defence if they hope to continue to fend off Team USA, who came too close for comfort last night. 

While Team Canada coach Mel Davidson probably didn't think a shootout was the best way to win this game, for a fan it was unforgettable.

It doesn't matter what level you play at, every hockey player gets a moment of glory. It's that moment you don't forget; it's your equivalent of a gold medal or Stanley Cup. 

I had mine last week. 

I play in the Cambridge women's rec league and I'm in the bottom half of the team skill-wise. Still, that week I had a pretty good game, and managed to bang a rebound into an empty corner to help our team finish with a tied score of 3-3. 

When the game ended that way, we went to a shootout. Our coach named me as the third shooter and I had a bit of a crap-my-pants moment. Since I was a kid I've suffered from terrible performance anxiety. Then I realized I needed a plan. The goalie had saved a few glove-side top-corner attempts, and that's usually my best shot. While I was trying to decide what to do, the first shooters on both teams scored. Then the next two went. Neither scored. Then it was me. I made a quick decision about my plan and jumped on the ice. 

As I was heading out, my teammate yelled, "Just skate fast!" That's what saved me. Otherwise I would have over-thought it. I put my head down, moved my feet and stopped thinking. 

I skated down the left side of the ice, then began to cut across the high slot. I'm a right shot, so I looked to that far top corner and when I saw the goaltender move in that direction, I turned and shot back toward the near-side post. Miraculously, it went in. I was so shocked, I forgot to celebrate. I turned to see if the other player had scored and saw my team spilling out onto the ice. What a feeling. I walked on air for days after. Funny how people at work just don't get why you can't stop talking about a GWG in a shootout in rec hockey.

If I thought I was addicted before.... 

As I write profiles of young female hockey stars, I notice that the majority of them played with boys when they were young.

Meanwhile, over the last 15 years, girls' hockey associations have been growing to the point where most have houseleague, B, A and sometimes even AAA options for girls. These are unprecedented times for girls' hockey.

Yet I've spoken with several elite private school and university coaches who say that players coming out of girls' programs lack the aggression and scoring prowess that players in previous generations had. They recommend that girls play with boys -- provided they're in the top 50 per cent of the team -- until size becomes a factor. One coach told me that coaches in girls' hockey associations are too easy on young players and the prevalence of girls' leagues in Canada is why we don't stand out as much against Team USA anymore. He said we won't have any more Wickenheisers if we don't sign up our daughters to play with the boys.

I have two daughters, one who plays with the boys and one with the girls. What I see supports these views. My daughter who plays with the boys has to fight pretty hard to get and keep the puck. She's learning to stand up to more physical play. The shots are harder from a very young age. On the girls' teams, they tend to give each other more room and they're softer on the puck. I notice differences in the coaching, too. The boys' team coaches are more focused and intense. The girls' coaches seem to stress cooperation, fun and life values.

And each of my daughters is having a wonderful experience.

I'm so glad they both have the opportunity to play in leagues that meet their individual preferences. I'm grateful that we live in a time when little girls can sing Miley Cyrus with other girls in the dressing room and wear pink laces in their skates. Or they can choose to pit their skills against boys the same age to push themselves to the limits of their skills and competitive spirit.

My daughter who plays in a girls' league is quite clear that although hockey is her favourite activity, she doesn't want to play rep; she wants to play for fun.

My daughter who plays with the boys asked for hockey equipment when she was three years old, decided to play with the boys because in her words, it's "faster hockey," and told me she wants to play varsity when she grows up. So I think I'll listen to what the elite coaches are saying and keep her with the boys as long as she wants to be there.

And for the best interest of elite women's hockey in Canada, perhaps other parents of competitive little girls should do the same.

This post originally appeared at www.herhockeyonline.com

She's known as the  funniest player in the Team Canada dressing room. But the humble, gracious player I interviewed  takes her hockey career very seriously.

Unlike some of the young girls on Team Canada, the 29-year-old remembers when her parents tried to sign her up for hockey and the community centre insisted she take figure skating. The year she finally started hockey was the year after Justine Blainey won a court case allowing girls to play on boys' hockey teams. And she remembers the verbal abuse she took for playing.

"I can actually remember one time playing in a game and a mother came down from the stands and said 'I can't believe you're doing this, you're an embarrassment,'" says Ferrari.

Ferrari remembers watching historical events for women's hockey such as  the famous 1990 National game in Ottawa, known as the "pink jersey" game and the first Four Nations Cup (then the Three Nations Cup) in 1996. When she watched these early games, she began to think that a future in women's hockey might be a possibility for her.

She remembers idolizing the likes of Angela James and Cheryl Pounder, not knowing that some day she would play on the same team as her hockey heroes.

 "I always wanted to put on the jersey. But I never thought I would go to the Olympics," says Ferrari. "The more I got to see how good the girls were the less of a chance I thought I had to make the team."

 But her strengths as a gritty, level-headed, experienced defenceman with a great shot from the point earned her a spot. Her trophy case includes a gold medal from the 2006 Olympics and two golds and two silvers from four world championships. While she's centralized with the Olympic team this year, she normally plays for the Calgary Oval X-Treme. Still, with all that experience under her belt, she considers herself a "bubble" player.

 "Every skill is a challenge for me," she laughs. "I'm always working on something. I'm not one of those players that everything comes easy."

 "But I don't get too nervous. I don't really panic. I'm sure sometimes [Charline] Labonte thinks I should be panicking more." Another laugh. "But I don't usually get us into bad situations. And I'm a good teammate."

 Despite her  lighthearted manner, it's clear that the day she was picked for her first Olympic team is no joking matter. Telling the story of when coach Melody Davidson called her in to give her the news, she gets choked up and wipes away a few tears.

 It's also clear she takes the significance of wearing the Team Canada jersey very seriously. Her solemn reflections on the history of women's hockey reveal the respect she has for the pioneers of the game.

 "I wish more young girls understood how far women's hockey has come. Through my generation -- not through my work -- but through the work of people like Geraldine Heaney, Angela James,  Heather Ginzel, France Montour, Vicky Sunohara. All of those people broke down those barriers and now we have women's hockey at the Olympics. You speak to young girls and they didn't know it wasn't an Olympic sport or there wasn't a world championship."

"I think it's important we remember those people and what they did for women's hockey."

Interview photo: Bonnie Tice; headshot: hockeycanada.ca

Four years is an epoch in Sarah Vaillancourt's life.

It's about 6000 hours of workouts and hockey practices. It's the difference between being a young Quebecois phenom and a Harvard team captain with a Patty Kazmaier award. And it's the length of time between winning gold in Turin as a rookie and heading into Vancouver 2010 with recent losses against the US and a bigger role to play on Team Canada.

"In 2006 I was the second youngest on the team with no Olympic experience. I was on the 'kid line' and so proud to be there. I didn't have the maturity or physical strength to be part of the power play or penalty kill," says Vaillancourt. I know I've changed and I can take on more in 2010."

That may seem like a short period of time to go from being a rookie to a leader. But when your core traits are intensity and drive, a lot can change in a short period of time.

For instance, when Vaillancourt started playing hockey in her Sherbrooke, Quebec minor league at the tender age of five, she was moved up age divisions almost immediately because she was skating circles around the boys. And at only 15, she made Team Quebec and brought home a silver medal. When she was 18 years old, she barely spoke English, but only two years later she was pulling off straight A's as a Harvard student, despite missing classes for weeks at a time while she played with Team Canada.

But the desire to play hockey and play it well has always been the overwhelming force in Vaillancourt's life.

"When I was eight years old, I would make up dryland workouts for myself that I thought would improve my game. Whether it was on the driveway, in the garage or on a tiny pond at my cottage, it was always hockey. I just wanted to get better," says Vaillancourt.

That hasn't changed. Vaillancourt says that these days, the main role of her personal trainer is to stop her from pushing herself too hard in workouts.

 Speaking of pushing hard, what does Vaillancourt think it's going to take to win gold in Vancouver?

"Even more work than 2006. It's more than working hard. It's almost killing yourself out there. But I'm really confident in our team."

 Vaillancourt seems to have no trouble with confidence. Her confidence is the kind that's given her the ability to captain boys' teams and perform at a higher level than most athletes in the same age group. She won't tell me her best move, but she hints that it involves a toe drag. She cites as her strengths the ability to see the ice, use all her players and know where to go when she doesn't have the puck.

She says that better positioning is how to take your game to the next level, whether you're playing at an elite level or playing in a beer league. Her advice is that when you watch hockey on TV, really watch it. Examine breakouts and regroups and what the players are doing when they don't have the puck. When rec players know where to be, it makes the game more fun.

Vaillancourt doesn't feel like a celebrity but she does like that Team Canada is famous - famous for winning. While she's not in it for the star power, she wishes women's hockey was better known and appreciated.

"We work just as hard as male athletes. Sure we don't have men's strength and our game is different from the men's, but people don't take the time to appreciate the difference. It comes down to a lack of hockey knowledge," she says.

"But my million-dollar contract is that I can use what I've accomplished to inspire people. To go to elementary schools and influence kids in a positive way is very special." 

For more elite player profile blog posts and more, visit www.herhockeyonline.com

Photo credit: www.hockeycanada.ca